picking up other people's energy

Updated: Jun 1, 2020

if you already barfed a little and are like, "oh wow, Annie has totally lost her marbles"...either just go back to facebook or give me a second to explain.

we know that we are energy. we know we have no beginning and no end, and that after this life we move on to another place. kind of like the law of thermodynamics, energy cannot be created nor destroyed, and can only change in form.

spiritually we know that we are spirits (energy) and we also know that all spirits are matter. whether you can see it or not. we use our energy in many ways, to move our body, to speak, to think, to create, etc.

now if you don't believe in energy that's fine, but think of this, have you every been in a room or public place when someone is losing their shiz? you can feel how that energy feels inside your body. it's horrible. it makes everyone shrink up, run away, hide or defend themselves.

or on the other end, have you ever been in the room with a bubbly two year old who is so deliriously happy about bubbles being blown in the air? or think of Christmas morning with kids? their energy can light up an entire room (hey, that's where Monster's Inc the movie came from right? dang it, could have made a bazillion on that ).

anyway, energy is real. and the kind of energy you and other people are "putting out there" is real also. an easy way to think of it is like everyone's own personal WIFI signal. we are all putting one out there all of the time. and as you move through your day and life you are constantly coming up into and around other people's wifi signal. it makes me think of the first time I turned my wifi on in Chelsea, and over 40 wifi networks popped up for me to join onto. that's a lotta people really close to each other y'all.

but before I knew what any of this stuff even was, this energy wifi signal and networks? Well, for years I had had my wifi constantly set to "ON" and "SEARCH FOR ANY NETWORK" all of the time. I was open to anyone's energy, anywhere. 24/7. And we all know how that can drain your phone's battery while you are out and about running errands or away from home, but what about your own energy battery? I had no idea why I couldn't handle Walmart for more than 10 minutes. Literally, I could feel my desire to live draining away after a few aisles. I also had no idea why I LOVED shopping at high end department stores. like super high end. I loved walking through them, touching things, looking.

Instead of understanding what was happening to me energetically, I basically had chalked it up to what my brother's had told me my entire childhood, I was a spoiled rotten brat and thought I was better than everyone else. hence, hating Walmart, loving Saks.

I'm really glad I know that isn't true anymore.

Because here's what was actually happening. Because of my experiences and my own personal wifi energy setting, I was picking up other people's crap ALL THE TIME. It was like my setting was on "sad people with trauma and low self esteem only" wifi signals. And why was I set there? because that was my own personal wifi signal.

slowly, the more I learn about how freaking powerful we are as energetic spiritual beings, how powerful my thoughts are, my feelings, my actions, my prayers, I have come to deeply respect and honor and work on my own energy levels.

if you look at this chart, you can see the actual vibration levels of certain emotions:

once I realized that the energy level I was at, was also attracting other things, people, feelings, thoughts and experiences close to and around that same energy, like a MAGNET, I realized how I truly was creating my experiences.

now this is where we could get into some deeper stuff like how old unprocessed trauma (yours and generational) and negative beliefs are subconsciously there and attracting stuff to you all the time, but we aren't.

right now I'm going to tell you that you are constantly picking up other people's energies...BUT...you don't have to if you don't want to.

wait what?

yeah, just like everything else in life...you have AGENCY. you don't have to pick up their energy if you don't want to. even if someone is purposely trying to send mental daggers at you or bring you down, you can deflect those little suckers and walk away happy.

this has been a process for me to learn, and I'm still learning, but here are some of the tools that have helped me the most to not pick up people's energies I don't want to:

1. LOCATION LOCATION LOCATION, it's no joke why we are told to "stand ye in holy places". it's a no brainer to realize people who are attracted to, work at, and hang out at places with higher energy, also have to have that higher energy. or if they don't, they'll fake it a little, but won't last long. that means the people at higher energy places are pretty chill, willing to see other's opinions and way of life, they accept themselves and others, they are reasonable, they LOVE themselves, God and other people, they are happy, they are joyful they are peaceful. sounds nice right?

now, on the flip side, lower energy places, attract people holding on to lower energy feelings and experiences.

DISCLAIMER: this doesn't mean they are bad people. this has nothing to do with who people are, it is about where they are energetically.

if you take a little look at the chart you will see that the lower vibration emotions start with pride, and then just nose dive from there on out. people with lower energy feelings like anger, jealousy, desire, hatred, lack, FEAR and a whole lot of grief will be attracted to (without them not even knowing) places, people and things with those same lower energies.

I can't think of anyplace other than Walmart or the DMV that are full of people with lots of hatred, anger, fear, and grief that shop there a lot, hang out and/or work at. Are there other people there with other energies also? Sure! But it's what your wifi setting is on that only matters.

Before that I thought I would just have to never go to lower energy places, ever. And heaven help me, someday I won't ever have to step in Walmart, but for now, how was I going to make it? luckily there is a solution!

It turns out doing inner work, healing and growing emotionally and spiritually helps a ton! Who knew!? The more junk I cleared out and healed from, the higher on the scale my emotions and thoughts went. I learned how to think positively and rewire my brain. And the more I could think positively and enjoy life, the more positive and joyful circumstances and people started to trickle into my life.


I didn't have good boundaries around my energy. I didn't know where it was, where it stopped or why it was scattered. With the same practices of positive thinking, meditation and mindfulness I learned how to control, direct and allow my energy to flow. I also learned how to carefully direct my energies to only where I wanted them to go. I no longer had to give everyone my energy and attention who was wanting it.

This is when I consciously started directing my energy back into my self care, my marriage, my children and my home.

I also stopped giving my energy to people who wanted me to fix them, help them and heal them without them doing anything on their own. As Jill Bolte Taylor states in her book, "Stroke of Insight", there are only two types of people, those who GIVE energy, and those who TAKE energy. I know I can avoid takers, unless I'm prompted to help, and purposefully spend more time with givers.


I didn't realize that while I was tapping into other people's wifi energy networks (higher or lower), at the same time other people were tapping into mine. and some people were major users eating up all of my bandwidth. I would leave a party and think, "why am I so tired? why is my brain so foggy?" And all along I had unconsciously let people use up and suck out all of my happy energy for their own use. Now this is different than freely giving it, and it also why I was so confused.

I now walk into every place imagining my own little bubble of energy. I like mine to be pink and full of love. Or sometimes as radiant as a beautiful sunrise and just let my rays hit whomever needs a little jolt of happiness. But I do now have a big barrier around who gets to be in my bubble. My wifi network is now private and secure and encrypted. I'm still learning every day how to protect it even more, and more importantly, fill it back up. But I no longer am letting everyone just hop on and watch Netflix's "How to make a Murderer" on my energy wave.

4. And last but not least, keeping my energy high by lifting, restoring and maintaining it. This was something I learned at the beginning of getting help for chronic depression. And it is so obvious now, I kind of laugh at how I was so impressed at how well it worked.

If you are depressed, down or sad, DON'T watch, listen to or say depressing or sad things. Stop watching CSI, super downer dramas or reality tv. Don't watch anything that isn't uplifting or funny. Don't listen to sad music.

this is just more of the same low energy crap that's feeding the sadness and anger and all the other stuff you are trying to get away from.

another way to keep my energy high is to spend time in nature every day. seriously, this is SO EASY and FREE and DON"T TELL ME YOU DON'T HAVE THE TIME. that is so lame. you have the time, you can go for a 10 minute walk for crying out loud.

ok maybe I'm just yelling at myself because I haven't been outside in a few days, and maybe this post is just to remind me I need to listen to my own advice.

but overall...seriously, think of what makes you happy. make a list of what you enjoy doing, and add those things to your schedule. reading a book, taking a bath, walking for 10 minutes, sending a note or a positive text, starting a gratitude journal, praying, reading holy scriptures, text and spiritual woo woo feel good crap. all of these things lift my energy past courage and into happiness, joy and peace.

if you still are reading, you are amazing and a high vibe being. just kidding, thanks for taking the time, even if you don't agree with one word of it. that's ok, maybe some day you will get tired of living a low vibe sad George Costanza life. if you don't, then you must like it so I'm glad you are a little happy being sad.

but for the rest of you, own your energy. it is powerful, it's amazing and YOU have the power to transform it from low vibe, to higher. start hanging out at cooler places that make you happy, start doing things you used to but stopped because of some stupid excuse.

seriously, OWN YOUR ENERGY. it's real. I promise.

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